I personally learned a lot from the Ted Talk, like when the guy said when we become defensive, there are actually a lot of ways to show you are.
When your body turns into defensive mode, your body might not even know it. But there are symptoms, sort of like a when you get sick, you sneeze. The “symptoms ” included playing poor me of withdrawing deadly silence. I realized I became defensive because sometimes I withdraw into silence. Other symptoms might include wanting the last word of high charge of energy.
Luckily, the speaker listed a entire list of ways to settle down your defensive mode of get back to regular. Some of the easy ways was to like take a few deep breaths of go hang out in the bathroom for a few minutes, which really surprised me. The first step of the list he included was to acknowledge it. Next was to slow down, like stop talking. Then is to check your self talk. I guess make sure you don’t say I am stupid of I am the worst. Also, create a action step. Do something to try to stop your defensive mode. The last step us to start over.
Another interesting thing the talker said was to about the chickens. He and his friend had two groups, some that could cooperate, and some that wanted to be the best buy pecking the other. His friend put the chickens that can cooperate in one cage while the other chickens were put into another cage. What happened was very interesting, the green side chickens, the ones who could cooperate produced a lot of eggs while the red zone chickens, the other one produced very little eggs. In fact, there was only two red zone chickens left, the others were pecked to death.
Therefore, this ted talker explained what it was like to be in the red zones, not being able to cooperate.
